Today's mood

सानू सौदा नहीं पुखदा, सानू सौदा नहीं पुखदा...

रवि तो चेनाब पुछदा,

"की हाल है सतलुज दा?"

Sunday, August 1, 2010

The sea that saw no tempest...

Plunge deep into the blue sea,
A mystery awaits your arrival…
In the womb of immaculate shell
Lays a thing as sanctified as an apostle
A piece of pious beauty…a pearl
It peeps for your hands to reach it.

It has a story of its own
Concealed in it is the chronicle of pain, a yearn of life
This yearn has added leaps and bounds to its beauty
People say it’s inanimate, an embodiment of passive beauty
Can a thing which itself unveils the tale of its evolution be inanimate?

It lies hidden in the heart of the sea
Having seen the sea in and out of its varied moods
Having confronted the wrath of puissant sea during the tempest
It also witnessed the tender love of its waves
Nurturing and sheltering it like a guardian angel …
It has in store for you all such untold truths about its abode
The entire anecdote of its life to disclose unto you

Just yours for years, decades and ages
Waiting patiently for you to seek it
Pay it the reward of all the yearns it had confronted
Be a patient listener to its unheard accounts
And make it worth it…
Reveal its pristine exquisiteness onto the entire human clan
Make it the pride of the temptress of Adam

Just open it….reveal it…discover it...

Monday, June 7, 2010

Welcome to the museum part 1- “Kinder garten”

The honourable, greatness personified, the legendary Ajay Kumar- My certificates state I was born in 1990. My parents however till date argue between each other in which year I was born. My birth was a matter of happiness to the whole of India and Australia. Both the nations distributed sweets on the fruitful timing and date of my birth, therefore I call myself honorable.

I had a frequent habit of falling in love. My history of crushes goes long back when I had just entered school. There was a girl named "Roo" in kindergarten and her nose used to flood with a frequency of .6Hz, and I had a crush on her.

On one fine day
she came upto me with her nose hidden behind her handkerchief and said, “Ajay, I am leaving. Bye…”

The scene was extremely melodramatic. I did not go to school the next day, and the day next to that. I decided to miss a day’s food in her honour. However, as soon as evening came Chandrama entered my life. She was not as sweet as “Roo” however her chubbiness and cuteness gave competition to “Kavita”. Kavita was the bombshell of my Kindergarten school, and the fisrt girl of my life I shall call ‘Sexy’! The whole school fought to have lunch with her. She used to bring buttered bread in her lunch box, and the boys sitting around her used to bring chocolates for her everyday. She used to exchange her tiffin boxes with the admirers of her. As I always used to take half burnt rotis to school, I never dared to exchange my tiffin box with her, so I settled for Chandrama. She had no problems with my half burnt rotis. She never touched it is a different matter altogether.

Time moved on, Chandrama and I came closer. We started sitting on the same seats in the school bus.

On another fine day
on which Chandrama was absent on account of typhoid Purbita came and took the seat beside me. My heart started beating faster. I was too happy that day. She was the best friend of ‘Kavita’. My small mind played the first politics of my life. Our conversation went as such-

HH(His highness) Ajay Kumar- “who all are your friends? Will you introduce me to them?”

Purbita- “My friends are Sabya, Nishith, Shristi and Meher. I had fight with Kavita yesterday. I won’t talk to her ever. Yeah I will---”

By the time she completed the list I got up from my seat and took to my heels. I ran from the seat and went beside Kishore. The boy I believed to have come from Nigeria. I did not talk to Purbita for the next three years.

Ultimately I was successful in dating (lunching) with Kavita. I had somehow convinced my mother to give me bread and chocolate that day. I wore washed and ironed dress, polished my shoes myself and TOOK A BATH on a rainy day. The palpitating beats of my heart were at an all time high. It was raining heavily that day, and most of the boys were absent. Chandrama was absent too. Probably her mother thought it better not to disturb her sleep. So on the fortunate day of 19th august, 1994 I dated my first sweet heart ‘Kavita’.

However, our relationship did not last long. On the next day I saw her eating with Nishith. I went up to him and broke his nose. His nose is still crooked.

With every blow I delivered I said, “How dare you eat with my girlfriend? Kutte, I will finish you off.”

It was good the Kavita chapter came to an end. After a few months she looked like-


Saturday, May 8, 2010

A gonna be "legend" is back!

On the onset i would like to thank all those who commented and never grew tired of wiling my absence. Unfortunately most of the comments were anonymously send in Chinese, but surely i believe they were appraisals for my previous posts and wanted the reputed miss X back. I missed all of you, and especially the site links and pics which the chinese links directed to!

For a lower level sample of the directed site visit-

http://i44.tinypic.com/1610yn9.jpg

Long ago, a score years back i had a dream. In my dream the sexiest lady of all times (the one above is awesomely grotesque bitch in front of her) came to my dream and said, "one day you will lead an astray blogger to the path of glory!"

And as you all know today chronicwriter is famous and blogspots most known comic blogger.

Moving on, i have once again forgotten the last time i took a bath. However, as per my personal statistical average and my room mates it was not long ago; and as we have our final semester papers going on i am quite sure the auspicious moment is yet to come. To add to my worries is the dog who keeps on stealing my underwear. He has grown immense fondness for my underwear, and has stolen two of mine till date. He gifts the pilfered memento to his wife (i believe). May god do her good!

My papers will be ending on 12th and i believe the mess in which my room is will be relieved on the same day.



I became the student's editor of the annual magazine "SRIJAN" of my institute; so next year if you find a dumb,literature-less or with too much literature, less colourful or extra colourful, flamboyant or lusterless or for that matter anything as per your dislike then all the disputes are subjected to bharatnitham@gmail.com only.

I am spending this summer in Ericsson India pvt. Limited, Noida and I am praying every night before going to sleep.

"Dear God, please let the receptionist be damn hot and unmarried."

I have started working upon my looks, and presently i look much hotter than Bradd and Butler combined.

NB: 1) NOT TOO LONG is a milder way of saying it was at least two weeks ago!
2) Bradd and Butler never meant Brad Pitt and Gerard butler. Both of them are unmarried stock past the age of 40 living in my colony.
3) Bush came to visit me yesterday and as i was busy I refused to meet him.
(I had a phone call from my childhood crush She had called me bro by mistake and i was
squabbling over it.)

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Treading the troubled lane...

I wake up in the morning,
A beautiful dawn awaits.
With the firmament so blue,
And sunlight of crimson hue.
Birds chirping their morning raga,
The people continuing their daily saga…

Ambling down the city streets,
I witnessed the hell lying beneath my feet.
Nay the heavens cursed the mob,
All the happiness of their life it did rob.
The grave gravity of clouds had camouflaged the city,
People started to pray to God and their deity…

The earth shook like an unsteady chair,
With the sooty gunpowder filling the air.
One could see pools of blood watering the land,
Once a living being was now turned into mere sand.
The wails of women, the innocent cries of a child,
Reverberated and turned everyone wild…

And now the bureaucrats come forward to compensate,
I doubt their wisdom as they can’t see it is too late.
Can this compensation bring those innocent people back to life?
Will it prevent their beloveds from living a life full of misery and strife?
Such defensive and irrational measures will,
Surely add grist to the Maoist mill…

Friday, March 19, 2010

Where I belong....

Standing besides a curvy road,
Alone on a no-man’s-land
Flashed back my desire
Which once I had engraved on sand…

Those hissing of the waves
That pounding of the stones
I again heard the screeching and
Roars from the caves…

That treacherous night had befooled my heart,
A new storm of emotions in my life did start
Enticed by that perfect figure
A desire to make it mine in my heart did linger…

The austerity of his face,
The profundity of his eyes
The smoothly combed flaxen locks
Now on my plight here mocks…

I had confined him to my ambit
A flame of love in my heart was lit.
Many a dreams about our life did I intertwine
I nurtured the illusion that he was all mine…

Nay the destiny intervened
He had an ambition floundering in his mind
An ambition to be at the pinnacle
Owing to which colossal complications we had to tackle…

We had united to see each other throughout the trials of life,
Never wanting to be each others’ weakness during times of strife.
Nay I had to free him of our sublime relationship
With his evocative memories now I have to live…

Today I’m standing on the same road by the sea
This road leading me to a no-man’s-land
But today I don’t have our names engraved on sand…

He has become a distant memory,
But never for our alliance will I ever be sorry…
He’ll always be my most cherished desire
I’ll still love him though I know he was a sheer liar…

Friday, February 19, 2010

Woman,mighty is thy name.....

Stroll through a posh locality in the evening, you’ll find yourself in an ambience of fragrance of scents. A half clad angelic form whisks by your side—ruddy cheeks, ruby lips, flamboyant attire, curly locks, poignant eyes and all curves exposed slyly. Her fantastic sight arouses the ogler in you. You have to glance at her, you may mean it stealthily. But it must register with her or else you’ve treaded on her corns. After all what for has she appraised herself before the mirror for an hour? Just to entice her Romeos…. Be courteous to her for she is ‘Eve’, the temptress of Adam.

The Adam in man is inherent. He has not turned his eyes from the temptress. In this machismo culture, women remains a commodity well adorned individually, well placed in the showcase of social showroom-a figure to be had- merely an thing to satisfy man’s passions. She is meant to be kept confined to heart and home. She is ordained to remain in his ambit. Her tragedy is that she has accepted her role nay she is coquettish about it. Cosmetics are her life buoys. Tempting and enticing man is her perpetual interest at the same time lambasting man for his masculine culture is her pet hobby-what a paradox.

There is a notion that the status of women has undergone an overhauling in the past few decades. Names of various eminent women are cited to justify this notion. But does this advocate the fact that women enjoy a respectable position in this machismo world? All this is a mere hoax. The words of William Shakespeare “Frailty thy name is women” have left a permanent etching on my thought process. Such contemptuous remarks were again echoed by Khushwant Singh who referred women as a ‘perpetual parasite’ on male from the cradle to the grave—on a father before tying a nuptial knot, on a husband as a better half and on son as the ‘evening’ of her life.

How can one doubt on the strength of a woman, knowing that, even as a neonate she did endure the shock given by her own ‘not- so happy’ parents at the time of her birth. During her teenage she valiantly confronted the persistent gazes of one and all. Then during the later half of her life, she simultaneously did justice to her triple faceted countenance that of a mother, a daughter and a better half to a novice in handling the relationships.

How can an individual who has such a multi faceted dimension to her life be possibly so worthless a creature??
I leave the answer to you readers to decide whether God’s most sublime creation, woman, is just meant to be despised at.
Has she just been created to be kept confined to heart and home………..

Friday, February 12, 2010

In Conversation With God-1;


"Man proposes God disposes." For a supreme soul like me dedicated solely to the uplift-ment of mankind, a few things don't come easy! I belong to the breed of engineers infesting this planet who consider few acts as a lethal sin. Today on this propitious day of Maha Shivratri, in front of Lord Shiva, I am going to make the confession of the sin I did today.

me: "O' mighty and the most puissant Lord Shiva. I come to thy gracious abode to seek forgiveness!"

god:"yes, my son first tell me who are you and what is your model number? then tell me what have you done?"

me:"O omniscient, I am Ajay Kumar, model number 8:05 am,26th january 1990, House number 420 Haryana, India."

god:"My register shows no registered Ajay Kumar in it. Were you illllllll???"

me;"no my lord. I am a perfectly legal born son .sorry it is 1989. the habit of bluffing people on this earth made me think i could even bluff you and postpone my death... "

god:"I am omnipresent, omnipotent and the maruti omni. Yes my register has the following entry---
name:ajay kumar
born:26 jan, 1989
time of birth:delivery order signed at 7:58am, earth timings may vary as per urgency
death:one year after he loses his virginity
unique qualities:flirty, falls in love with every second girl, proposes to every third girl, gets ditched by every girl(and a die hard fan of Jessica Alba) "

(suddenly God shouts in havoc reckoning voice,"Parvati don't come outside. We have a very bad human here.")

god:(husked voice)"how is Jessica these days? The connectivity of metacafe is weak here up in these Himalayas; these politicians need to be taken to task."

me: "lets discuss it some other day. when we have vodka and rum with us. girls sound bad unless you are drunk"

god:"true..true...come to your confession part, you are wasting my time. Katrina has some problems with Salman going on. I have been called in the form of Allah to help. Morever, i have to see the movie My name is Khan, hope Karan Johar doesnt teach us to flee with our moms in this movie! The cosmos was full of eloping gods after KANK."

me:"Today, I put a disgrace to engineering breed. I took bath twice a week.(both time alone)"

god:"YOU SCOUNDREL, A**E HOLE; I send you to this earth for upliftment of mankind. Save water and teach the world the importance of water, and what have you done today you took a bath. You scum bag, you don't deserve to be here. I am going to make sure you don't live another second. I am going to open my third eye now!!!"

me:"NO, my Lord. It is Shivratri today, so I took a bath."

god:"ohhhhh, then it is ok. Take bath on every Maha Shivratri."

happy shivratri:-

Monday, February 8, 2010

chronicwriter!

"Mr. Prason Christopher Robin" is one big time blogger, he is the official owner of "www.chronicwriter.com" and writes under the pen name of "chronicwriter" famous for his red undergarment. Incase, Mr. Thackrey is reading this,which I doubt he will, chronicwriter shall delete his facebook account and deny the links with the blog. One thing I curiously need to know, why do south Indians have names worth giving wrist aches, and in some cases even tongue aches for illustration try to speak "Pilavullakandi Thekkeparambil Usha"?

Chronicwriter’s last post "save the tigers in the woods", did put me in a funny state. I read his blogs fortnightly not on a daily basis. So yesterday while suggesting a few juniors of mine interested in reading blogs, I without hesitation referred them to the ingenious poster-"chronicwriter". A few of my suggestion takers were girls!

A few moments later when I for my own updating turned to chronicwriter's blog, I was surprised to see his first adult post(it's not that I didn't enjoy it; he is too awesome not to make anyone laugh). So basically I made a "poo-poo" of myself.

On saturday I had a test in my CAT coaching test, and I am proud to inform everyone despite my best efforts( which include keeping the most beautiful girl's picture near me, copying from the nearby person, giving the test with katrina kaif's name) I topped. Please don't ask me from which side, but I topped!

We had a GD session after that which humorously turned into a fish market. A batch mate of mine, pronounced a beautiful sentence on marriage which ran thus-“marriage is not an institute where you experiment things”. Even in case it’s an institute I am eager to join it, please tell me the exam details. I will work doubly hard and make sure I top this exam, and this time from the front.

While typing this blog I received a chat message on gtalk from a CSE friend:

abhijeetranjan90: tomorrow is total mass bank for cse guys…

ajay: cool;

bt class also consists of girls…

abhijeetranjan90: dey can attnd

ps: 1)I would like to seek forgiveness from miss X for not including her in this post. I tried my level best but could not fit her in here somehow. I promise her a spot in the next one, and no charges.

2) My list for 14th February is up to date and complete, anyone interested can contact me at 14febonedaylover@gmail.com or st.valentinerocks@gmail.com

3) This is a free advertisement for chronicwriter, i wont regret the same from his side.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Uphill time going on, and harder times ahead!

It seems I have filled my plate with lots of trouble to last for my entire leftover engineering life of one and half years. The onus(es) I am trying to handle presently are the TPR post(Training and Placement representative) of my ECE batch, being the Executive Editor of SRIJAN the institute's annual magazine and not to forget my eight hours of CAT preparation classes on weekends. With only a month to go for the printing of magazine the whole SRIJAN team is haywire. To meet the deadline of 20th april release we have to start working nights, and today is the first night! Hell is in front of Saurav and Rajeev the team's two designers.
But no regrets, i am enjoying the pressure!

The side-effects of workload has started to show itself. I have started having nightmares. Last night Abhra, the magazines student editor, and Karan, the Managing editor, were running behind me with the previous year's magazine and dagger in their respective hands.

I had my birthday on 26th January. There were a few surprises waiting for me. One was, the X of my previous posts messaged me happy birthday and the second was, my blogs first post to whom I had dedicated called me. Unfortunately, i couldn't pick up the phone and had to settle by replying to her message. I recieved a deo from two of my classmates, most probably they pitied my irregularity at bathing and hoped it would help, however, as I am allergic to perfumes and deos had to tuck it in the suitcase. Thanks anyways yet I prefer friends who come empty handed.

Yesterday was my parents 23rd marriage anniversary and I turned out to be the last one to wish them. Thanks dad and mom for getting married and bringing me to this earth. Moving on to today; today was Ghandhi's assassination day. For the first time in my life I forgot to stand in silence at 11:30. Sorry Mr. Ghandhi! I was late by three minutes today. Hope you rest in peace.

Moving to lighter notes, we have Valentine's day coming. I am eagerly looking forward to it. I am hoping to propose a lot many this year. My fingers are crossed, and I seriously pray St. valentine gets a bit emotional and pities me...

A help from your side- make sure you send a pink boxer to Mr. Pramod Muthalik, a Ram Sene leader. He is greatly active in beating up couples visiting discos and seen roaming on 14th feb.
(google pink chaddi campaign for more details!)

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Another 365 days of your life!

Look back at 2009 and you will surely find at least one moment that crystallizes out separately. Few of us lost someone whom we loved, some of us found someone who made 2009 remember-able, few of us tried a few new things out of which some failed and out of which some clicked. After all 365 days is not a small number! Lord Krishna’s words, “Good and bad, success and failure both make a life. Life without one of them is alike a world of sugar without salt.”

One such memory of 2009 is properly etched in the cerebrum portion of my approximately 500gm brain. I visited “Vaishnodevi” last march, and I saw something. The “something” was not something extraordinary; it was a pretty common scene to be seen in nearly every temple- a mother of a cute kid was asking her son to fold hands in front of the goddess. Nothing unusual! Nothing spectacular! My mother asked me to do the same thing when I was some five year old. However as far as I can recall she never gave me a reason that satisfied me on why I should fold my hands in front the idol.

Parents usually tell their children to do things and to abstain from rest. However, few are open up to discussions on the same. Marriage is one such thing. Love marriage in most parts of our country is still a taboo! Marriage decisions are made by our parents, amongst our parents for a life their children have to live. Haryana is a leader in murdering their children,who break these rules, in case the children fall in love with a person of the same village. “Khap Panchayats” are well known and well heard of taking decisions about life and death (as a matter of fact district and session courts even don’t have this right!). A few were killed and a few were banished the last year.

Similarly 2009 was memorable for mother India even. “Nations are born in the hearts of poets, they prosper and die in the hands of politicians”. Mr. Surendra Sharma, a comic hindi poet, well said once-“it was better when we were uneducated at least we voted for person like Sardar Vallabh bhai Patel and Lal Bahadur Shastri; and now when we claim we are educated we elect Lalu Prasad Yadav, Mulayam and Mayawati. ” Uttar Pradesh most probably added another tar to its already besmirched image. Mayawati squandered 2k crore rupees for propagation of her bloody party. Shibu Shoren is marching for power in Jharkhand. People of Jharkhand either go for cheap dirt like “kuda” who ate more money than his whole relations could digest and shit in the morning, or killer like Shoren!

Mr. Rathod is yet to be arrested. Hope so he gets arrested before he dies of old age!
May all of you have a memorable 2010!